ppl my age have children what the hell i am a children

(Source: dumpybear, via jesusdontcare)


i wish i can just read good novels, watch great movies, listen to my favorite songs, travel, see beautiful things, eat whenever im hungry and sleep when im tired but no no, i have to go to school, graduate, find a job and struggle. 

(via jesusdontcare)

if im not hot in like 5 years im so done with everything 

(Source: readm03475587639r, via jesusdontcare)



He’s just mad because he can’t acquire all the apple juice that I’m acquiring. (x)

That is a very powerful story. Also, that really is an incredible price on apple juice.

(via jesusdontcare)



 What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before they got married


(Source: shreracha, via hotboyproblems)


reason i want to be dog

  • cute
  • fluffy
  • sleep a lot
  • no exam s

(via fake-mermaid)


third wheeling two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple

(via hotboyproblems)

It isn’t that I don’t enjoy talking to people, I just hate small talk. I don’t want to talk about your holiday plans or your body clock or your bowel movements. I don’t care. Pretending to care drains me. I want to know what keeps you up at night.

Benedict Smith, Incarnadine (via alteringminds)

(Source: the-ills, via stretchovertheanvil)


Sometimes I wonder whether I have any real intelligence or if I just have enough random bits of surface knowledge to bullshit my way through most things.

(via fuckyeahloldemort)

(Source: shady-god, via jesusdontcare)